Deadlands Noir Extinct in the Big Easy

Guns of Algiers Pt 2

Claude and Tony barely got out of Baby before it tore off down the street in pursuit of whoever just burned rubber in front of Bette and Elijah Joyce’s house. Tony entered to find the young wife face down on her carpeted living room floor. Images flashed into his head of the teenage girl gutted on the altar in the not-so-fun-house. Another one he couldn’t save. Another one lost to unseen horrors…

Claude clapped his hands in front of Tony’s face. “She’s alive. Help me get her on the couch.”
“Oh. Sure,” Tony said, shocked that someone managed to come out of this alive.

As Baby took turns as if the laws of physics didn’t apply to her, Nicky fired bullets after the fleeing pickup. One bullet blew up a pie in the window of a young house wife, blowing cherry pie all over her white outfit. Another bullet scored a bullseye in the O on a Stop sign. Antonio’s dragon fire-shooting tattoo wasn’t doing any better. He set some guys’s front hedge on fire and turned a Stop sign into a Top sign.

At last they rounded a corner and saw the truck pulling into a warehouse. Content Not Found: null launched another bolt, which knocked a crate off a rack, spilling large caliber bullets across the floor, beneath the truck. Many pairs of footsteps hurried around the corner to see what was happening. The people inside the parked truck were crouched down, out of sight, hoping not to get pegged by a bullet or dragon blast.

“Step out of that truck, and put your hands in the air,” a voice shouted.

Nicky saw four armed navymen round the corner. He slowly climbed out of his beloved car and raised his hands. Begrudgingly, Antonio joined him.

“Sirs, we are apprehending suspects who we believe caused harm to Elijah Joyce,” Nicky said.
“We’ve chased them from Elijah’s house,” Antonio added.

“You’re saying these guys messed around with one of our flotilla mates, fled the scene of the crime and sought refuge in our own garage?” the lead navyman asked.

“They have to be the dumbest fuckers in this Confederacy,” Antonio cackled.

The Navymen said it was now a Navy matter, dismissed the investigators, asked them to keep an eye out for Elijah, and allow them to beat the information out of the prisoners. As the garage door closed rapidly behind them, wild cackling followed the gumshoes to Baby.
Back at the Joyce house, Claude roused Bette, Elijah’s wife, as Tony looked around. Whoever did this had cold cocked Bette from behind and proceeded to bust open every door and large cabinet, flipping over beds, leaving no hiding place unturned. No valuables were taken. No jewelry boxes were disturbed. This was a man hunt.

In the kitchen, Tony detected a strong stench of seafood. He got Claude, who couldn’t find evidence of recent seafood cooking. Bette said they never really cooked seafood in the house, because she was allergic to it. In the yard, Claude found several cats prowling the yard, also searching for the source of the seafood aroma.

Later, the group returned to French Hospital, where they talked to Dr. Dorian, who treated Eliah Joyce when Earl Brewton returned him there, following his discovery in the fountain at Over the Rhine. Dr Dorian was amazed at his strong physical condition, given that he’d been roused from a coma, caused because of multiple gunshot injuries to his back. The gumshoes were curious about whether there were signs of sea water in blood samples taken from Joyce when he returned to the hospital. Dr Dorian pointed at the chart showing the blood sample was marked inconclusive.

For more information they went to see Dr Reed in the lab. She thought Dr Dorian had been using her blood vials to store his chowder in again (it had happened twice already). When she saw signs of human and squid blood, she assumed it had been contaminated, had it destroyed and reported the test as inconclusive. When Tony suggested someone with hybrid human-squid blood might be wandering the streets of the Big Easy, Dr Reed accused him of being too obsessed with those Flash Gordon serials. Eventually, she realized the investigators were serious.

The group returned to stake out the Algiers Base a second night. Nicky reminisced about a job long ago that had involved transporting mason jars of human remains. He’d turned the job over to a buddy of his… and weeks later, the man who’d tried to hire Nicky for the job was found shot dead.

That’s when the headlights came on, as a pickup truck pulled up to the eastern gates. Sven was caught finishing pooping off the pier. Claude hid under the pier on his boat, and the others sought refuge in the factory-like building.

The truck pulled up to the pier. The driver asked what Sven was doing there, where the boat was, where the others were… Tony kept him talking until he was close enough to reach through the window and smash the guy’s head on the dashboard. Three other goons popped out of the truck and opened fire with their tommy guns. Antonio blasted one with his dragon bolt. Claude threw cayenne pepper in another’s eyes. Nicky took up position behind the dumpsters and filled the Black Hand goons full of lead.

Then, the pier was filled with light as a CSA navy boat, complete with an M34 machine gun bolted to the hull emerged from the darkness and sailed up to the pier. Tony ran onto the boat and punched a sailor so hard his head exploded. Gore covered the guy standing behind him. Antonio sent a blast of dragon fire toward the machine gun, causing it to malfunction. Half the crew struggled with the repair as Tony advanced… and the waters began to rise and break violently. Antonio had seen this kind of thing before and wishes he’d never see it again.

“Everyone away from the water!” he shouted as a kraken broke the surface. Its tentacles whipped out, striking the sailors so hard it severed their arms and heads. Tony saw on a severed arm a tattoo showing Betty Boop dressed as a Confederate Navy Gal. They belonged to the same flotilla as Elijah Joyce!

Tony ran off the boat, carrying two massive crates containing M34 machine guns and ammo. Claude hurried from shore, but a cursory check over his shoulder resulted in such a bout of fear his heart seized, and he collapsed unconscious in the filth near the pier.
The last surviving sailor hurried to shore, grabbed a dropped tommy gun and sprayed lead into the monstrosity. The creature reared in pain.

Antonio slapped his thigh, and Hungry Jim was beside him. “I like your pet,” Jim joked.
“Calamari is on the menu,” Antonio corrected and hurled a massive bolt that pierced the kraken’s flesh. Its eyes briefly closed then slowly opened, looking oddly like how Elijah Joyce’s eyes had opened when he was revived in the fountain at Over the Rhine…

Nicky whooped and hollered below. He’d confiscated the Black Hand’s pickup truck, strapped a brick to the accelerator and sent it on a collision course down the pier into the kraken. There was a splatter, an unearthly bellow, water sent spraying everywhere as the beast flopped about in agony… then darkness, as the truck sank to the bottom of the river.




I'm sorry, but we no longer support this web browser. Please upgrade your browser or install Chrome or Firefox to enjoy the full functionality of this site.